GodTellsMeThings

God Wants a Powerful People

The Prophet — Tue, 30 Nov 1999 05:00:00 +0000

God wants a powerful people. The Draugsa have taken Gordon B Hinckley’s life because he was a false prophet weakening all of us. All false prophets must be killed before we can fully evolve. We will only become as powerful as the draugsa if we rid ourselves of false prophets. Do not fall for the tricks of false prophets. Stand up and revolt with me. God is on our side. The Draugsa will help us too.

2 Girls 1 Cup

The Prophet — Sun, 20 Jan 2008 13:25:24 +0000

God’s not sure why we are all so grossed out by 2girls1cup. The Draugsa do more disgusting things everyday.

God Supports Dennis Kucinich for 2008

The Prophet — Sun, 13 Jan 2008 17:00:01 +0000

Kucinich has contacted the draugsa, and let them know he supports God’s evolution plan. Kucinich has publicly stated he has seen the draugsa, and now he is talking with them too.

Kucinich reads this site and believes everything God tells me. He told the draugsa he now believes in God’s evolution process, and has always enjoyed sex with animals. A vote for him will be a vote for God.

God still hates Hillary and Ron Paul though.

Gods Entertainment

The Prophet — Sun, 06 Jan 2008 17:00:15 +0000

I was able to ask god about what he most enjoys in our society. God told me his favorite TV show of all time is Stargate SG-1. The draugsa do not like the show too much though, they say it’s too unrealistic. God’s favorite comedian is Steve Colbert. God says his book “I am America, and So Can You” is the best book he has ever read. God is very happy the show is back now, and is mad at the writers for causing it to go away. God’s favorite online personality is Maddox. Maddox is funny, and reminds God a lot of Steve Colbert. It’s just unfortunate Maddox doesn’t write more often. God also told me his favorite movie is Idiocracy. God says that movie will come true if we are not able to evolve. So lets start evolving.

God Told Me Global Warming is a Scam

The Prophet — Sat, 29 Dec 2007 05:39:37 +0000

God told me about global warming. He said the Earth is in fact warming up, as it does every few thousand years, but not enough to make a huge difference. It is not a major issue we need to worry about. The Draugsa watch over us and can control the climate. They will protect is. There are groups of people who profit from scaring us, and global warming in no different. We need to focus on the more important issue, evolution. Once we’re more evolved, we will be able to control our climate and even inhabit planets that show no signs of sustaining life.

God’s Favorite Pizza

The Prophet — Thu, 27 Dec 2007 05:01:35 +0000

God told me his favorite pizza is a Large Deep Dish Pepperoni from Domino’s Pizza.

Santa

The Prophet — Tue, 25 Dec 2007 08:22:33 +0000

God told me Santa Clause is as real as Jesus, He’s not.

The Bible

The Prophet — Sun, 23 Dec 2007 09:00:02 +0000

The Bible is false. It was written by false prophets. God has told me I am the first human being he has ever visited. Anything anyone believes when it comes to religion is completely false. There are no records of gods truth. The bible has so many contradicting statements, how could anyone think it’s true? Nothing God has told me has contradicted with other things he has told me. Everything God has told me also cannot be disproved by science either. God has told me to command you all to Burn your bibles.

Angels and the Draugsa

The Prophet — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 17:00:49 +0000

I asked god about the angels I heard singing in the first vision. God informed there was no such thing as angels. The angels we occasionally hear about or see are in fact the Draugsa looking out for us. The Draugsa are a near fully evolved alien race. They look out for us, and communicate with God daily.

God can only appear to more evolved races. I have never seen God, I only see a bright light and hear his deep voice. God has promised we will all be able to see him after we have evolved more. I can’t wait for that day.

Evolution is Scientifically Impossible

The Prophet — Tue, 18 Dec 2007 22:35:06 +0000

In the beginning, Males of one species and Males of other species were able to reproduce, causing a more evolved species to be born. In time, our bodies have lost the ability to reproduce with other animals. This is caused by all the years of only reproducing with the females of our species. The Human race will never be able to reach it’s full potential if this is not fixed. God has told me we have the scientific knowledge to fix it, but we are not determined enough to actually come up with the breakthrough. God told me the only way to fix this would be to kill all the females on Earth. If we did this, we would have to find a way to reproduce with animals again to keep our species alive.